By Gail Rognan
In my time of solitude, I am learning to live in the world without being of it. I am losing dependence on the world and putting more dependence on faith.
It is in solitude that my inner freedom grows. I go to a lonely place to pray and remember all the works I do are not mine but of the One.
I am made free to fail. To worry and make mistakes, then re-group and shift to a better place next time I put myself out there to speak my truth.
I started writing as a young girl and my mother praised my writing ability. I started writing a journal over 30 years ago and still write in it every morning. I started writing what I call “soul poems” about 12 years ago. I even wrote a workbook that I used with my coaching clients that I self-published. But my writing was always a hobby and I have struggled with how to express my feelings,
It wasn’t until I got diagnosed with breast cancer that I finally woke up and realized that I had to take my creativity seriously and write a book about my journey which I published about a year ago. Writing this book is my way of healing myself and helping others who are going through a similar journey.
When you have a God-given gift, a creative talent, you must share it. It is not about making money. It is about expressing who you are and touching others. It is about living out your purpose.
I truly believe that if we don’t do this, we risk getting sick. That is what happened to me. I did not take my gift seriously and it got stuck inside my body and turned into a disease because it was unable to get out. I let my driven nature rule my life and it caught up with me.
When I write or draw or paint, I feel free and at peace and this effects everything I do and everyone I interact with in a positive way.
I teach, give reiki, pet-sit because they are passions and because I can and they are needed. I write because I must.
I write to understand myself and my needs. It keeps me honest and mindful. It makes me a better citizen of the world. When others read what I have written it reminds them to share their own gifts. To be their true self. To be of service.
I have learned that when things are going well, I can get complacent and relax my daily, spiritual practices, which includes writing. But the old behaviors start creeping in and before I know it things go back to the way they were, and they become worse.
If change, tension and uncertainty can become our friends and a natural part of life, it can be the catalyst for greatness and healing.
In order to learn how to fly, we must stop chasing our ego’s demands for money and power and security and listen to our heart.
I have flown the nest. Flown the coup. Cancer is what woke me up and gave me my life back the way it is meant to be.
I have learned to live in the tension and I am learning how to fly.b
My successes and failures are slowly losing some of their power over me and being, becomes more important than having. I am worth more than the result of my efforts. My worth is not related to my usefulness.
The healing words and actions I speak and do are given to me.
In this moment, I am at peace.